Buy a better burner. The drive you’re using is somewhat obsolete, and you’re obviously having significant problems with it. It’s probably defective in some way. DVD burners have gotten really cheap, and there is little point in wasting time with an older burner that was unremarkable even when it was shiny and new.
With that said, two of the top things that cause problems with DVD burners, irrespective of the manufacturer, is not runing the drive in DMA mode, and having a bad IDE cable. Change the drive cable, and check in your windows settings to make sure the drive is running in DMA mode 2 or 4.