It hurts so bad

vbimport

#1

I was watching Safe Haven tonight and as it ended I got up and started out of my man cave to tell my wife how good the movie was. When all of a sudden it hit me and all I could do was cry. It been years since it hit me this way. I do not know why I am writing this I guess it just help when others know how much pain you are in. You see I lost a little girl just before Christmas in 1972. Since then I have remarried and have his hers and ours kids and a boat load of grand kids so I have so much now. But when this hit all I could think of was her the one I lost this pain is so bad and so deep even now. I would think that at 67 and after so many years I could deal with this .
Guys it just hurts so bad tonight


#2

Felling much better took shower and said a prayer and went to be. I think God knew what I need I went into a deep sleep for five or six hours. Because of a head injury years ago I only get light sleep. This is the first time I have been in such a deep sleep that I woke up not having any idea how long I had been asleep or what time it was. That really help take most of the hurt away. You never get over all of it. At least now I can think of her without the pain killing me.


#3

[QUOTE=samlar;2715944]Felling much better took shower and said a prayer and went to be. I think God knew what I need I went into a deep sleep for five or six hours. Because of a head injury years ago I only get light sleep. This is the first time I have been in such a deep sleep that I woke up not having any idea how long I had been asleep or what time it was. That really help take most of the hurt away. You never get over all of it. At least now I can think of her without the pain killing me.[/QUOTE]

Samlar your not along,I lost a daughter in 03 she was 24 and died in her sleep ,no good byes , no warning.I’m 64 and have parkinson and get depressed quite often,and sleep is so messed up I don’t know what day it is.I have to check the computer every morning.
It’s hard to look at pictures of her because she still in my heart and a hole is there.I have another daughter I love deeply ,the older one and I worry about but she seem to be quite self reliance and has a great husband.I love life and take every day as it comes".peace be with you"


#4

Sorry to hear you were feeling so down Samlar but glad to know you’re feeling better.

Time is indeed a great healer but the pain is always there.

Unfortunately sometimes all you can do is just try and get on with things.

That’s a very sad story too Doug. :sad:

I think too many of us have tragic losses in our lives but it’s a case of being as positive as possible and valuing the people we have left even more.

[B]Wombler[/B]


#5

samlar, I lost an 18 year old sister back in 1968 when I was six years old. I was young and I think that made the loss somewhat easier for me. My father, on the other hand, never got over it. She died on December 18th and that year she had bought Christmas presents before she died that she wrapped and had placed under the tree. On Christmas we had to open them without her being there. This ruined Christmas for my father for the rest of his life. Every Christmas I could always find him off in a corner at some point sobbing. Losing a child has to be the toughest thing a parent can face. I hope you find some peace. The same goes to you maylord.


#6

You know I wish I could tell someone that it get better over time but it doesn’t it seems like just yesterday.I now can look at pictures of her as before I couldn’t.
Now that I’m older friends have been dying it seems that’s their dropping like flies and where and the heck did that saying come from.But that’s different you expect the older people will die first not some one that hasn’t lived a full life.

one last word ,take one day at a time ,like with my PD ,one day at a time and if I wake up in the morning- it will be a fine day.


#7

Peace with you!

God bless you all!


#8

As a father this is one of my greatest fears.

The only “solution” to stay sane i found as of this moment is to tell my girls i love them every day.

Death has many faces, is always not fair and will always win in the end. There are so many hostilities on this planet that it’s almost a miracle that people live for so long.


#9

[QUOTE=Mr. Belvedere;2716017]As a father this is one of my greatest fears.

The only “solution” to stay sane i found as of this moment is to tell my girls i love them every day.

Death has many faces, is always not fair and will always win in the end. There are so many hostilities on this planet that it’s almost a miracle that people live for so long.[/QUOTE]

I know you know how samlar and i feel ,Mr. B,it’s the same feeling when their born ,I could tell you got it when you talked about your last babie when it was born ,how proud you were that they are part of you, I know your a good dad just by the way you talked about them.


#10

[QUOTE=marloyd;2716055]I know you know how samlar and i feel ,Mr. B,it’s the same feeling when their born ,I could tell you got it when you talked about your last babie when it was born ,how proud you were that they are part of you, I know your a good dad just by the way you talked about them.[/QUOTE]
Thank you. That means a lot to me.

Last weekend the youngest was admitted to the hospital, because she was not able to take in the required daily amount of bottled milk. All is relatively well now, but then the transmission of our car broke. Fun times. Expensive times.

But i couldn’t care less about the car or the costs, although i really need that car and have very little money. It’s just a car.


#11

[QUOTE=Mr. Belvedere;2716263]Thank you. That means a lot to me.

Last weekend the youngest was admitted to the hospital, because she was not able to take in the required daily amount of bottled milk. All is relatively well now, but then the transmission of our car broke. Fun times. Expensive times.

But i couldn’t care less about the car or the costs, although i really need that car and have very little money. It’s just a car.[/QUOTE]

I’m not a religious guy but my prayers are for you and the little one
Peace be with you.


#12

[QUOTE=marloyd;2716264]I’m not a religious guy but my prayers are for you and the little one
Peace be with you.[/QUOTE]

Awww thanks old fart :bigsmile: :bow:

They’re doing ok now. The wife hasn’t slept for a whole day so she is now getting some well deserved rest :).


#13

I still believe what I do best is being with and taking care of my wife. Next comes of course her only daughter. It’s something that makes life incompatible with the flow of time.


#14

What got me this was after so many years it all of a sudden hit me like a ton of bricks I saw and felt it all again. Have not had that happen in years. It always hurts but never back to the pain as when she died except this time


#15

It’s strange and very unpredictable the things that can set you off at times.

Not long after my Mum died I remember welling up in a supermarket just looking at the food.

That must seem like a really small and inconsequential thing, I know, but sometimes it’s not just the thing you’re looking at, it’s the memories attached to it.

My Mum was a great cook and we always had great family dinners. It was the thought of never ever being able to taste her food again, and the favourites that I always reminded me of her, that really hit home with me.

[B]Wombler[/B]


#16

Good news and bad news i guess…

Daughter is doing super now that she has got special medical powdered milk. No more big pains and she is starting to discover the world around her. Tomorrow we are going to church for her christening. I’m not a religious person myself, but my wife loves this tradition and there’s no harm in the tradition so i’m ok with that. It’s a very big deal for my wife so i support her.

But my own brother decided not to come to church, because he’s busy. It’s the nth time he let me down on important things because he’s tired or busy and other lame excuses. I’m not really sure i want him on my 40th birthday party this year… then again i don’t want my parents feel miserable because their two sons are bitching.

I know life is way too short to be angry at people, but i don’t want people around me that make my girls or wife miserable. Brother is now angry that i texted him about this and claims i’m always taking the side of my wife. Well duh… i married her. I love her and my girls. They love me.

Oh well. Brand new day tomorrow.


#17

Life is to short ,if he wants in family get together he should honor your wishes ,if not hit the road , now I have one sister and because my wife and her had a falling out I don’t ever see her .Wish I new how to make peace I would love to visit .


#18

[QUOTE=Mr. Belvedere;2717407]I know life is way too short to be angry at people, but i don’t want people around me that make my girls or wife miserable. Brother is now angry that i texted him about this and claims i’m always taking the side of my wife. Well duh… i married her. I love her and my girls. They love me.[/QUOTE]

The way I deal with this type of person is to not care what they do. I do this by not expecting any specific performance from them. I also don’t go out of my way to accommodate or include them in activities. I expect as much from them as I would a stranger. This makes it easy for them to exceed my expectations.

BTW, good to hear the little one is feeling better.