I really dislike my mother, she's unreasonable

note: this isn’t a technical question, nor am i a kid who don’t understand a mother’s harshness means caring, i’m 20 years old, i don’t go into detail on how she ruin my life and send me away to someone and all that crazy stuff pelase read whole thing, and you’ll see why…

i have adsl internet at home, with my bedroom pc and telephone connected to the voip modem, the voip modem provides BOTH telephone service and internet service.

last week, on saturday, the ISP shut down it’s telephone and internet service for unknown reasons, when i phone customer support, they claim there was a problem but they already fixed it, although i still could not coneect online or make a phone call, they then said they’ll send someone to fix it for me on wednesday. they advised that until he comes, i should wait a few days to see if it comes back online, which i did, i waited until tusday.

to be honest, i really don’t want some stranger to come into my room just to fix a phone jack, i don’t like other people seeing my room, it’s a little thing called privacy. i really hoped that everything would come back online before wednesday, that way the guy wouldn’t have to come fix it

but on tusday morning, the internet and phone still wasn’t working, so i began thinking about the source of the problem, i began to think that maybe the phone jack/plug in my bedroom might be broken, so i decided to try plugging the voip modem to the other phone jack in the living room, of course i had to unplug everything and sort though wires and all, which was very frustrating.

i manage to finally get my voip modem unplugged and took it to the living room, plug it in there, i then went out and bought a 16ft LAN cable to connect my pc to the voip modem in the living room. i then turn on the modem, and the internet and telephone work instanly.

so i realised that the problem was my room’s phone jack, but the jack doesn’t seems to be broken, which is strange, perhaps maybe when the phone company shut down it’s service it shut down one of my jacks too, i don’t know, atleast though, everything is working again.

at this point, my mother comes back.

she saw that i’ve drag the modem out to the living room, she also saw the wire that was branching from my bedroom to my living room, mother, being the a very clean and perfection driven woman that she is, gets mad and ask me what i was doing.

[B]mom: what are you doing? what’s with that long cable?

son: the internet and phone wasn’t working, i had to plug the modem to the living room and dragged the cable back to my bedroom.

mom: i don’t like that cable streaching out like that! it’s a nuseinence! it’s lying across like that, it might trip me over! i don’t like it!!![/B]

i ignored her and went back to my room to use my pc, a while later, she came bursting in and was shouting at me, yelling and saying that i never should have bought that 16ft cable, she starts swearing at me and call me names and said some horrible things, as if it was all my fault…

[B]mom: you stupid kid, why did you bought that 16ft cable? it’s too long! it’s bulgy, look how long it is! what were you thinking!?

son: hey look, i have no choice, the internet wasn’t working, i had to get that wire, big deal, it’s just a wire. could you think of a better way?

mom: you don’t understand anything! you stupid kid! look how ugly it is, it’s getting in my way, look it’s lying across a ground, what a mess, look at this, what a mess! you (censored foul language)

son: HEY! what did i do wrong? the modem wasn’t working in my room, so i took it out, now it’s working, ok? you got telephone and i got internet back, what’s wrong with that?

mom: didn’t you already phone them about this? they were shutting down service to fix something right? they said they’ll have somone fix this on wednesday, why can’t you wait? you impatient ****!

son: it’s not the isp’s fault, it’s the phone jack in my room, it’s not working, thte service was only suspend for a while, it was back online long ago, besides i already waited for two days!

mom: well someone is coming to fix it for you tomorrow right? so why did you have to get this ugly cable!? it’s messy! ! HATE IT!!!

son: look now that i fix it, we don’t even need the guy to come! and i don’t want him to come in my room! it’s private ok?[/B]

at this point things were getting hot, i obviously don’t want some stranger to come into my room just to fix something i already fixed, my mom then makes some redicilous comments on what i should do next…

[B]mom: i don’t like the cable sticking out of your room like that, i hate it! unplug everything and PUT IT ALL BACK IN YOU ROOM!!!

son: what’s wrong with you? do you know i’ve work all morning just to get this modem unplugged and sort out all those tangled up wires? it took me forever!

mom: i don’t care you ****, it’s making my floor look ugly! why did you have that cable leeachs out like that huh!?

son: Dan-it! it’s not working in my room! that’s why i took it out in the first place!

mom: IF YOU WAITED FOR A FEW MORE DAYS, MAYBE T WOULD HAVE WORK! see the living room phone plug is working right now, if you had been patient, it would have come back online and you wouldn’t have to make a mess like this you ***** son!

son: i already waited for 2 days! and when i unplug it a while ago it STILL wasn’t working! why would i do all this if it were working! oh my what’s wrong with you?!

mom: i bet if you plug it back in your room! it’ll be working right now!

son: OH WOW! how did you know that? how do you know it’s working right now!

mom: the telephone company problely fix everything a while ago! you stupid ****!

son: wow what a coincidence! so when i unplug my modem they were still offline, and it happened to come back online the same time as when i plug it to the living room? what kind of sense is this?

mom: put it all away!

son: you know what? fine!!! i’ll unplug everything again right here! right now!!! i’ll plug the thing back to my room right now!!! you kept on saying it’ll work, what if it didn’t? huh? what if it didn’t work???

mom: i don’t know! i don’t care! don’t use it then, wait for the guy to fix it!

son: i don’t want him in my room!

mom: don’t talk **** to me like that! i could kick you out of the house! i could destory your pc! becasue i bought it for you! you’re living in my house! MY HOUSE! your room is mine! everything in this house is mine! you don’t deservev it!

son: huh? what on earth! there you go again, changing the subject just so you wouldn’t have to come face to face…with the fact that…YOU ARE WRONG!

mom: what? you *************** you ungreatful**********that’s it i don’t want to argue with you on this matter! i can’t believe you want to bring up this stupid arguement!

son: what? me? you mean i bring this up? i was just SITTING in my dan ROOM minding my own business, you came in and and start yelling at me and call me names! what did i do wrong! i am asking you! tell me WHAT DID I WRONG!

mom: oh how misfortune of me to have a **** son like you! you should have die like a dog, i should have left you in the street and watch you suffer, then i’ll see what you’ll say! you *****son, you know people like you in this world should have died long ago! you don’t deserve to live!

son: you!

mom: you know why you should die? becasue you don’t understand anything! you are a stupid person! you don’t know how to think! you don’t understand this world! because your too retar*!

son: ARRRRHHHHHHH!!! dan it you! what did i do wrong! all i want was to help you get back our service! is that a crime? huh? i only wanted to help! and i did, i fixed everything!

mom: i don’t like your 16ft cable, it’s crazy! it’s making my house look like a DOG HOUSE!

son: what did i do wrong then? tell me?!

mom: you’re not being sensible! i can’t talk to ***** like you, you’re crazy you know??? you stupid son, you make me sick! i never should have give birth! to have a son like you, why is god so cruel to me!

son: hahahahaha! oh it’s all my fault, i help you and this is what i ended up!

mom: i hate you hideous laugh! look what you’ve become!

son: huh what?

mom: you’re so disrespectful of me! i’m not talking to you stupid ******, i’m going out. i don’t want to talk to crazy people.

son: you’re avoiding me because you know you’re wrong! i only did what i felt was right and just bese on the situation, i only did it becasue i don’t want the guy to come into my room! and it was the appropreate action to take! i don’t want stranger to see my messy room! i made a correct decision, i don’t know why you’re blaming me for nothing!

mom: oh so now you think this house is yours! you want to kick me out huh!

son: don’t you dare put your words in my mouth! you beach!

mom: DON"T call me mother again!

i know i never should have swear, but me and mom both have anger management issues, i lose control in the end, i was wrong, but this whole thing, she kept on saying i was wrong and saying the cable was this and all.

so i want you to tell me, was what i did really so bad? i fix the internet and telephone but ended up displeasing her by having a wire leading out from my room to the living room, i don’t know though, what did i do wrong!?

i’m still waiting for her to come back, i hope she doesn’t…well…you know.

she may be crazy or whatever but it’s her house and she is your mother, if she says move it then move it.

yeah i know, but if i move it then that means no telephone service. she’ll be messing everything up.

she beat me all the time, i don’t really care, i just hope she comes back, i’m worried, and please tell me what i did wrong.

Dude how will “she be messing everything up”? If the phone line is broken it has nothing to do with her, unless she’s cut the line or something. From what you have said they are coming to fix it so just wait until then, A few days without phone or net I’m sure you’ll manage.
I don’t mean to sound rude or anything but have you spoken to a professional? It sounds like you may have a few issues to get out of your system. Another option may be to get your own place so you can do what you want. Don’t get me wrong I hate my mother too, I haven’t spoken to her in 8 years and have no intention of ever speaking to her again.

I agree with slayerking. Have your own place. That’s what I did 15 years ago when I was still not yet 20 (though it was my father, not mother.)

Thank the heavens i don’t hate any of my relatives. I just told them i’m not their family tech support hotline. My own brother was enraged when i told him to solve his own freakin internet troubles, but never asked for tech support again. Ooh… the peace and tranquility…

but me and mom both have anger management issues, i lose control in the end, i was wrong, but this whole thing, she kept on saying i was wrong and saying the cable was this and all.

After reading this i only can type: Mr Coolaid: You are an idiot. You expect people to reason with you despite their lack of interest and knowledge. If you want to live the way you want to get your own place. I would have taken away your internet if it were my house and you started testing me like that.

Anger management issues… is that the new eufemism for “it’s in your right to be angry at people who don’t understand you”? Learn to live with each other or get the hell out.

In fact, i have this great idea: Be angry at me and my post! I’m thousands of miles away from you but i bet you want to strangle me because i think you’re an idiot.

Maybe both are at fault, but whoever is wrong doesn´t really concern me.
I would not want to live like that…so the answer is “simple”: I would move out.
Do it…
You will survive…but you may live longer if you learn how to control your anger.

well I couldn’t have said it better myself. :bow:

coolaid your post seems to be about “me me me” (meaning you).
You diagnosed the problem correctly then why couldn’t you fix it yourself if you have such an aversion to people invading your privacy (your room).
Your mother has every right to be angry with you when you treat [U]her home[/U] as a hotel or workplace.
If you don’t like the way she likes her home to be, then get a home of your own.
At your age I was about to be married and take on all the responsibility that comes with it. My mother was a hard woman but she had to be given the upbringing she had. I still love her and wish she was here today.
Have respect for her. How would you like it if she came into your room and plugged the vacuum cleaner into a socket trailing the wire across your bedroom floor and left it there. Remember respect is a two way street.

You did put YOUR cable in HER home!

Me and my mum didn’t get along too well when I lived at home either. Things changed when I moved out (when I was 16) - we now get on really well, she’s more like a good mate than my mum. :slight_smile:

Having said that, I agree with the others - however much of a pain it may seem, whilst you’re living there it’s still her house. I’m guessing you get benefits like having your meals cooked and your laundry taken care of :wink:

Oh my where to start on this one…
first your 20 .if you don’t like how your mother treats you …get your crap and get out of HER house.stop acting like a little bratty kid
Second,Whats the big deal about the phone people coming into your room? whats up with this…(no one mentioned this) but dang dude privacy or not.if your phone jack is not working it needs to be fixed and since your not a phone company employee then geeze lighten up let them fix it …
Thirdly, it is your mother’s house and me being female …I can agree a cable drug through the house just to plug into a modem…well it is a trip hazzard…
Next, Whats the big deal about not calling them and getting them to come fix it…you pay for your ISP and if its not working at your place they don’t know that unless YOU call them…
Lastly,Regardless if your mom seeks any help or not…you need some …many people live in abusive situtations…and your just allowing the cycle to continue stop it…get some help…move out an d become a health person …

Hmmmm, my mother passed away 20 years ago; I wish she was here so I could apologize for every argument we had while she was alive and I knew everything.

Moral of this: In more years of life’s experiences under your belt, all of this will seem so trivial.


Where is Dr. Phil when you need him?:bigsmile:

Sounds like Norma and Norman Bates… better hide the strychnine

Well, I moved out when I was 17… I had serious conflict with my mother at that time. The conflict continued until I was about 25 - when I realised that it was possible to be friends with my mother, and that actually, she cared about me deeply ( despite how she (and certainly me) acted sometimes).
As other posters have mentioned, it may be time to move out and get your own place :iagree:
You are an adult responsible for yourself now, so take the next step and get your own place. It may not be easy financially etc, but you’ll be able to do your own thing, and probably find out a lot of new things about yourself.

BTW - when you have your own place, things break down and people have to come and fix them… they wil constantly “invade your privacy”. Have you considered that they are also invading your mother’s privacy by coming into her home (of which your room is only a small part)?

Hope it all works out well :flower:

[B]Yo Momma![/B]

Sorry…I couldn’t resist :disagree:

i think this is what you wanted Here

i think this is what you wanted Here