GUYS ONLY: How many of you

vbimport

#1

…are too lazy to find a new girlfriend?

I am! I’ve been with mine for several years so I’m used to her. She’s almost like family…lol…jk!

I HATE when she brings up the “M” word. You guys know what it is! Last year she gave me an ultimatum: think about proposing or she would leave me. So…I bought her a puppy. She’s been quiet about things…for now.

C’mon guys I need some support here.


#2

“M” or “Ma” word? :smiley:

Kinda true what you wrote…


#3

TBH if she wants to look at settling down and you don’t then I think maybe you should go your separate ways.

You shouldn’t be pressured into something you don’t want to be and she shouldn’t have to wait. I think maybe you are in the ‘comfort zone’ and so are too scared to move on when really you aren’t right for each other.


#4

If you haven’t married her yet then you may not think she is the one!
I knew Ruth was the one for me after 6 months and we’ve been married now for 40+ years.:slight_smile:
If you can’t see yourself going through life with her then the best thing to do is to set yourselves free to seek alternatives. Just because you are comfortable having her around is not enough in a relationship.
Don’t be lazy examine what you want out of life, relationships,etc and pursue it.
Just as an aside I have more freedom now than when I was single if that is your worry, but that is due to Ruth and our relationship.


#5

[QUOTE=i_love_cake;2038792]…are too lazy to find a new girlfriend?

I am! I’ve been with mine for several years so I’m used to her. She’s almost like family…lol…jk!

I HATE when she brings up the “M” word. You guys know what it is! Last year she gave me an ultimatum: think about proposing or she would leave me. So…I bought her a puppy. She’s been quiet about things…for now.

C’mon guys I need some support here.[/QUOTE]

  1. i’m a female…but hey you posted your question on the internet …deal with it…!
  2. you have been with her for ‘several years’ as you say…and your not sure if she is the one but yet you also say your too lazy to find a new girlfriend… - maybe its time for you to ‘man up’ and have a talk with her…after all do you want to end up with 30 dogs and one girlfriend who isn’t right for you??
    3)Marriage is not a bad word…when it is the right person…ask all these people here who have been married 20+ years…
  3. NEVER>>EVER!! give in to an ultimatium…just sit down with her when she is calm and tell her pushing you into a marriage proposal is not the right thing to do for it would not be from your heart…just your head…and would spell disaster for you both…
  4. get up with Da_Taxman for online dating sites :wink: i’m sure he is an expert by now :wink: *love ya Taxie *

#6

Call her bluff then…if she leaves you (this was last year anyway) then who is to say she wouldn’t do the same after the knot has been tied?


#7

Posted by SS
3)Marriage is not a bad word…when it is the right person…ask all these people here who have been married 20+ years…

      Believe me I have asked the people that have been marriend 20+ years and you wouldn't want to hear their response.:bigsmile:  If no kids are in the future, I say stay single, its much cheaper if it doesnt work out, take it from one who knows.:doh:

#8

[QUOTE=alan1476;2039303]Believe me I have asked the people that have been marriend 20+ years and you wouldn’t want to hear their response.:bigsmile: If no kids are in the future, I say stay single, its much cheaper if it doesnt work out, take it from one who knows.:doh:[/QUOTE]

so your just telling him to treat her like a hooker…after all i’m sure they are having sex…but he wants it to be with no commitments…so isn’t that what you guys use hookers for?

i say if he doesn’t see a future…the best for both of them…is to end it and go on…but ya see…i see this guy …would rather be in a comfortable position than be alone and miserable…or bitter …


#9

Hooker or no hooker, you pay one way or another. The piece of paper that is a marrage certificate is just a lock and key.:bigsmile::bigsmile::wink: Does marriage make you love her more, I think not. But if you plan on having a family ( kids) marriage is very important. I will agree to that.:flower:


#10

A+++++ S_S You need to make a choice.


#11

Yup, [B]i_love_cake[/B], sounds like you just want to have your cake and eat it too, but then you know they say the proof is in the eating, after which you may find the cake is … :bigsmile:.

Hope this doesn’t get too serious, life’s too short as [B]Arachne[/B] says :p. I for one still believe in True Love :iagree:.


#12

These are always difficult topics to handle from an outsider’s point of view.

We can argue, and speculate, and offer advice all day long.

Fact is, there are more variables we don’t know about, and thoughts and emotions we don’t know about.

Seeking advice on a subject such as this is proof something isn’t right. If you want my advice: don’t look for advice. You’re in it, you’ve got to do what’s right in your own eyes and your own heart. A bunch of people (who all mean well, i’m sure) hiding behind a computer is a poor substitute for following one’s heart and trying to do the right thing.

Just my two cents.


#13

I’ve been married for 20+ years and I think everyone should get a little taste of hell on earth.
Why should only a few of us have all the fun?
My wife is really a saint and I don’t know how she has put up with me for all these years? I’d rather be married than single.
I think you should do it or give her her freedom so she can find someone else and get married if she wants to.


#14

If the passion is still there like it was at the beginning, then by all means you don’t need a new GF. The level of commitment is close to the same as marriage as I imagine that you live together, share the same bed, responsibilities, etc.

Marriage is supposed to be a lifelong commitment. Make sure she’s the right one for you, as spending the rest of your life miserable or a lot of money for a divorce is not worth it IMO. Just explain to her that you aren’t ready, but could definitely see it happening in whatever timeframe you’re comfortable with. At least let her know you are entertaining the thought.

I’ve been engaged and the relationship didn’t change much at all. The only difference between a LTR and marriage is a piece of paper and ring, with the exception of getting out of it. Why did I not get married? I caught her cheating on me while pregnant with my son (DNA test done, he is mine). Why should I have had to suffer through the financial struggle that comes with divorce had we been married because she cheated on me?


#15

[QUOTE=alan1476;2039303]Believe me I have asked the people that have been marriend 20+ years and you wouldn’t want to hear their response.:bigsmile: If no kids are in the future, I say stay single, its much cheaper if it doesnt work out, take it from one who knows.:doh:[/QUOTE]

My parents have been together for 30 years. My mom told me a few years ago that if it weren’t for the kids (me & sibs) she would have left my dad a LONG time ago. LOL.

I know 4 under 30 couples that were married. They are all now divorced/separated. They went to marriage counseling for a few months and decided to part ways.

I’m not necessarily opposed to marriage, but I just don’t get why some people (usually women) need the symbolic gesture performed in front of family and friends.

Marriage just seems forever…lol. I don’t know what I’m gonna want for dinner years from now. There are a lot of things I want to do before I settle down. I want to travel some more and have a 3-some (M-F-F). :iagree: LOL

Seriously though, why fix something that ain’t broken. Leave marriage out of the equation and everyone will be happier.


#16

[QUOTE=Sexy_Southerner;2039342]so your just telling him to treat her like a hooker…after all i’m sure they are having sex…but he wants it to be with no commitments…so isn’t that what you guys use hookers for?
…[/QUOTE]

Whoa slow your roll…

I never said there was no commitment. A couple can commit w/o a marriage ceremony.

Women need that element of love when it comes to sex. IMHO, guys don’t. Let’s face it, we’re wired differently. I don’t have to like a chick to sleep with her. I don’t even need to know her name.

We’ll see how honest guys are after my above statement.:smiley:


#17

[QUOTE=jhtalisman;2039452]
I’ve been engaged and the relationship didn’t change much at all. The only difference between a LTR and marriage is a piece of paper and ring, with the exception of getting out of it. [B]Why did I not get married? I caught her cheating on me while pregnant with my son [/B](DNA test done, he is mine). Why should I have had to suffer through the financial struggle that comes with divorce had we been married because she cheated on me?[/QUOTE]

Wow…that had to be rough. Did you call the show Cheaters? :wink:

How would explain that to your son one day? It’s good you made it out alive.


#18

I think love is so important. I’m very spiritual (NOT religious) in that regard and lovemaking >sex.

As someone said, they believe in TRUE love. Well I’ve been through a lot of sh1t and I’ve gone from believing in soul mates to being pretty damned cynical about it to be honest. There’s defo someone out there for everyone but not in a fate-like way. Just hope for a good match.

But i_love_cake, if love is not important to you my advice is: break up, if possible on good terms. You’re obviously nowhere near ready to settle down and you need many years before you do IMO. Just keep relationships casual ATM. And she is defo not a match for you.


#19

[QUOTE=i_love_cake;2039642]Women need that element of love when it comes to sex. IMHO, guys don’t. Let’s face it, we’re wired differently. I don’t have to like a chick to sleep with her. I don’t even need to know her name.

We’ll see how honest guys are after my above statement.:D[/QUOTE]

If all you care in life about is this kind of one-track thought, you might find yourself living a very shallow meaningless life within a few years. If you’re not sure about your love to her, talk about it with her.


#20

Does anyone remember the song by " Meatloaf" called [B]Praying for the End of Time".[/B] I think the lyrics sum this thread up.:bigsmile::bigsmile: Also known as [B]Paradise by the Dashboard Lights[/B]