First of all, you should only have ONE packet-writing program – such as InCD, FileCD, Drag-to-Disc, or DLA – installed at a time. These programs will conflict with each other if residing together.
Second, after you have clearly (and cleanly) uninstalled the ones you were using (I don’t think DVDInfoPro qualifies as a packet-writing program), I would try Roxio Drag-to-Disc. It is clearly more stable and functional that InCD at this point. I have very little experience with the others I mentioned.
You can usually get an OEM version of Easy CD Creator 6 for about $9. I would just install Drag-to-Disc. Drag-to-Disc can quick erase a DVD in less than two minutes. It does not do – as far as I can see – full erasures. I use Nero or Easy Media Creator 7 do do a full erase and that takes less than 25 minutes or so.
Formatting a DVD with Drag-to-Disc can be done as a quick format or full format. Quick formats take about two to three minutes, I believe, and full formats certainly much less than an hour. Writing speed is media/drive dependent – faster drives and media (currently all RW media I know top out at 4x) do it faster – although packet writing will take longer than a mastering-type burn at the same speed.
Also, be aware that system integration issue can affect things – inadequate power or OS issues, although this doesn’t seem to be your issue.
Hope this helps.